Stick, Figures

When I was 18 or so, one of my friends (Francis; he's not blog literate, so most of you have never heard from him 'round here) spent the summer taking Eskrima and Wing Chun (no, not Wang Chung).

Eskrima ... "refers to a class of Filipino Martial Arts that emphasize stick and sword fighting. The term and the art most probably originates from the Spanish word esgrima which is the term for fencing.[1][2] Other related terms which have entered into common usage include "Kali" and "Arnis de Máno" ("harness of the hand")."

I spent that summer, when I wasn't working at the movie theater, lifting weights with Francis in his garage. As he was taking this martial art, he'd come home and have me run through the katas [Kata (型 or 形, literally: "form"?) is a Japanese word describing detailed choreographed patterns of movements practiced either solo or in pairs.] with him. Basically, it was learning stick fighting second hand.

I loved it. I used to practice the form Francis taught me all the time. I only knew the one, but it was a two stick form, and it made you feel like a badass.

About a month or two before Christmas, a martial arts studio opened on Main street here in Stillwater. Elite Combat Systems, it was called. The windows said it offered Brazilian Jujitsu, Jeet Kune Do (the system created by Bruce Lee), Thai Boxing, MMA and Kali-Eskrima.

Just seeing "Kali-Eskrima" on a window got me excited. Or made me nostalgic. Something. Not enough to actually go check it out, however. Mine is a mind full of fear, after all. I did talk about how cool it would be to take it. I was in love with the idea of it, that I could take something like that.

Apparently my lovely wife was listening because on Monday when she got home from work, she handed me an envelope with Elite Fighting Systems on it. Inside was a gift certificate for a one-month membership to the studio. Further, she said, "Class is Wednesday at 5:45."

On the one hand, how cool is that? On the other, I was mortified. Now I would have to go. What if there were a bunch of meatheads? I haven't been in a fistfight since seventh grade (unless you count throwing illegal elbows to the nose of the opposing team during a soccer match). It's something I'm generally afraid of.

So wednesday rolled around. I go to the studio. There's literally no one there except the head instructor and his assistant and some kids behind the counter in gis playing Modern Warfare 2. There's an old wrestling mat on the floor and a rack of sparring gloves, but other than that, the place was pretty spartan. And dark. They hadn't yet turned the lights on.

Anyway, I walked up to the counter, gave them my gift certificate and discovered that Kali was on Thursday at 6, not Wednesday at 5:45. Nothing like getting all nervous for nothing. But... I liked the guy. He was nice. About what you'd expect from a real martial arts master. Sort of that inner calm and confidence.

Today (yesterday), I manged not to think about being nervous about going to my first class all day. Steph got home from work more or less on time, and I away I went.

When I walked in this time, there were about 10 people in there, everyone with ratan sticks in hand. The guys nearest the door pretty much immediately introduced themselves to me and starting being, you know, friendly. No one was aggressive. None of that male bravado stuff.

They got me a stick. And then class started and Sifu (no joke, they call the guy "Sifu;" his real name is LaDell Elliott) showed me the first five basic strikes, and then paired me up with a veteran and told him to teach me something else I can't remember the name of it, but it's basically a block and counter where you end up smashing your stick into the other guy's thigh, knee or ribs.

They tried showing me some footwork, but hitting me with it all at once was like trying to teach someone how to swing a golf club. So much little stuff to think about. Sifu came to practice the block and counter with me and told me to stop thinking about it, because if I did, I'd screw it up the entire class. After about a minute where he just kept swinging at me and making me block, I was doing it. Cool feeling.

After that, they taught me the first disarm, whereby the person whacking at you with the stick suddenly finds it an awesome idea to let go of the stick or have their wrist broken. The first time I got it right, it was awesome. It's like you do magic and suddenly you have their stick.

Toward the end of class, we all sat down around the mat and Sifu would call for two people to come up and do some kind of form or exercise. Basically, they'd practice blocks and strikes, sticks flashing in and out and up and down, hands darting in and out, changing the direction of the other person's attack or block.

At this point, I realized I had a huge shiteating grin on my face. It dawned on me that I wasn't watching this in a movie, but was sitting in a studio where someone was going to teach me how to actually do this stuff.

I've wanted to take this stuff since I was a little kid. How has it taken until my 37th birthday to actually happen?

Anyway, as class ended, I noticed everyone milling around, along with some newcomers arriving, but no one leaving. Sifu walked up to me and asked me how I liked the class, to which I said "it was really cool," and then he asked me if I was staying for Jeet Kune Do.

Huh?

Apparently a membership at the studio entitles you to dine from the whole buffet of offered martial arts, and furthermore that Kali/Eskrima and Jeet Kune Do are sort of married at the hip (when you saw Bruce Lee working with weapons in his movies, that was Kali/Eskrima). I knew I needed to get home to Steph and Kaia, so I said no, but the more I think about it... fuck yeah I'm going to take Jeet Kune Do.

I can go to class Mon.-Thurs. at 5:45 and take Kali and JKD on alternating days, and as of this moment, I can't fucking wait for Monday to get here. Apparently there's a "morning" class from 11:30 to 1:00 M/W/F. I'm thinking about hitting that, too.

Anyway, to sort of visualize what I'm learning to do, it's the same martial art that was taught to Matt Damon for the Bourne movies. Remember the bit with the rolled up magazine? Kali/Eskrima. That stuff you see Denzel doing in the trailers for Book of Eli? Jeet Kune Do and Kali/Eskrima.

Awesome.

Thanks, babe. Best present ever.